John McCain: Sleeps Like a Baby

"I respect anybody who's willing to run for president. After I lost, I slept like a baby. Sleep two hours, wake up and cry. Sleep two hours, wake up and cry."

(Tonight Show)

Gilbert Gottfried: Now He Remembers

“This is true. A documentary on The Military Channel said 'Hitler did not like dirty jokes.' I knew there was a reason I didn't like Hitler.”

(Twitter/Home)

Mae West: Reputation's Overrated

“I’m the girl who lost her reputation, but never missed it.”

(HQ)